En este articulo

• How one simple question can transform everyday decision-making
• The difference between acting from love versus obligation
• Why self-love sometimes means action and sometimes not
• How present-moment awareness simplifies difficult choices
• A practical way to reduce inner conflict and mental debate

A Question Born from Tiredness

The other night, I was too exhausted to even take a shower after a long day out in the world. I’d been everywhere from government waiting rooms to box stores, to print shops, and doctors’ offices. By the time I got home I felt too drained and too tired to do one more thing.

But then my inner voice asked: If I love myself, what is best for me now? And of course, I had to admit that if I love myself in this moment, even through the tiredness, I would have a shower and rinse off all the energy of the day.

A New Way of Choosing

This was a new question for me, a new way of approaching situations. Because don’t we all, at times, do things, or don't do things, just because we’re either too lazy, too tired, or just don’t feel like it, even though we know it would be better for us to do that thing, as in the case of my shower? Or the other side is that we often do things because we think we "should" or because someone else expects us to. 

So asking ourselves what we would do if we love ourselves in this situation raises the energy and raises the perspective to one where we are encouraged to choose what is truly best for us, even though it may seem like we don’t feel like doing it for whatever reason. And of course, the reverse is true as well: sometimes we push ourselves to do things simply because we think we should.

When Loving Yourself Means Resting

After my shower, I did feel 100% better. And as I got ready to go to bed, well actually, after I’d slipped in between the sheets, I remembered that I had meant to change the bedding before going to bed. However, since I was already in bed, I wasn’t too enthused about getting back up to do anything. So I asked my new question: If I love myself right now, would I get up to change the sheets?

And the answer was no. In this case, it was more loving to just stay relaxed and at rest, rather than force myself to get up, pull the sheets off, and put fresh ones on. That could wait until tomorrow.

What surprised me was that the same question that had spurred action in one moment invited rest in the next. Now, in another scenario, another day, another time, I might have gotten a different answer.

Living in the Energy of Now

And that’s the wonderful thing about this question. It belongs entirely to the present moment. It has nothing to do with rules and regulations, with things we’ve promised, or things we’ve wanted to do. It has to do with the energy of now.

This question can be asked in almost any situation. A friend calls and wants you to go to a movie. You can ask yourself: If I love myself, what is best for me now? And the answer will vary in each moment according to what is best for you in that precise moment.

There is no need for mental debates, for guilt trips, or feeling obliged, or anything like that. It’s a clear-cut question that gets right to the bottom of things. Or perhaps it gets to the height of things. It looks at things from a higher perspective, one rooted in love.

A Simpler, Kinder Way to Live

And I’m sure that if we all start living from this principle and from this guidance, our lives will not only be different but so much happier. Our world would also be different and so much more in balance if everyone made choices using this, or a similar, question.

It simplifies things. It takes away the doubt and the mental debate. And it leaves only pure love energy and respect for ourselves, which, in turn, is for the other person as well. Why? Because when we are in sync with the highest good for ourselves, based on love, not greed or guilt, it is also the highest good of all.

What would change in your life if this became your first question instead of your last?

Sobre la autora

Marie T. Russell es el fundador de InnerSelf Revista (Fundada 1985). También produjo y presentó un programa semanal de radio del sur de Florida, poder interior, de 1992-1995 que se centró en temas como la autoestima, crecimiento personal y el bienestar. Sus artículos se centran en la transformación y volver a conectar con nuestra fuente interna de alegría y creatividad.

Creative Commons 3.0: Este artículo está licenciado bajo una licencia Creative Commons Reconocimiento-Compartir Igual 4.0. Atribuir al autor: Marie T. Russell, InnerSelf.com. Enlace de regreso al artículo: Este artículo apareció originalmente en InnerSelf.com

Libros recomendados:

If this article and question resonated with you, the following books explore similar themes of self-trust, present-moment awareness, and making choices rooted in love rather than obligation.

* The Let Them Theory

por Mel Robbins

A practical and empowering mindset shift that helps readers stop over-managing others and return to listening inwardly. Mel Robbins introduces a simple principle that reduces emotional friction and overthinking, making it easier to choose what is truly aligned with your own wellbeing in each moment. Readers exploring self-trust and present-moment decision-making will find this especially accessible.

Order on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1401971369?tag=innerselfcom

* How to Love Better: The Path to Deeper Connection Through Growth, Kindness, and Compassion

por Yung Pueblo

A gentle yet insightful exploration of emotional growth, self-awareness, and compassion. Rather than prescribing rigid rules, this book encourages readers to listen inwardly and respond from clarity and kindness. It aligns strongly with the idea of asking what is truly best for you in the present moment while remaining connected to others.

Order on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/0593582276?tag=innerselfcom

* Don’t Believe Everything You Think (Expanded Edition): Why Your Thinking Is The Beginning & End Of Suffering

by Joseph Nguyen

A concise and highly readable look at how habitual thought patterns shape our decisions and emotional experience. Nguyen offers a practical way to step back from mental noise and reconnect with intuitive clarity, supporting readers who want to move from overthinking toward grounded inner guidance.

Order on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0D47VYQMY?tag=innerselfcom

Resumen del artículo:

This article explores how a simple self-love question can transform everyday decisions by shifting focus from obligation to present-moment awareness. By asking what is truly best for you now, choices become clearer, gentler, and more aligned with inner guidance.

#selflove #personalgrowth #mindfulness #innerguidance #presentmoment #selfawareness
#emotionalwellbeing #selfcompassion #consciousliving #innerwisdom #selfcare